* Last month, I had a head-on collision with a light pole in an empty Blockbuster parking lot. Granted, I was only going about 5 mph but it still left a nice dent in my front bumper. How did this happen? I vaguely recall my head spinning with the thoughts of what should I do first? I have one hour to go to the bank, Eli is screaming in the backseat, return this late dvd, go to the grocery store, make a return at Kohls, and drop off this gift at the post office that is already three days late. Boom! And then I got a big wake up call as I came to an abrupt stop in front of said light pole.
* I listened to my messages the other day while cooking dinner and after I hung up the phone, I could not for the life of me remember any of them......who had called, what was needed. Nothing. All I remembered was that there had been FIVE. Thats it.
* I used to be able to speed clean my house in about an hour. Now I just wander aimlessly from room to room getting distracted from my original tasks by unmade beds, stray socks, toys that belong in the basement, messes I then find in the basement, magazines I forgot to look through, sewing projects that weren't finished, paint/fabric swatches I want to use that I stare at for 10 minutes, dust, dust, and more dust, Emma's Halloween costume that needs to be sewn, LAUNDRY, dishes, kids clothes to go through that have been outgrown or are out of season, fingerprints on every glass surface, AHHHHHH.
* Why can't I just try to be good at one or two things? My life would be so much simpler and easier. But, no. I have this burning desire to learn to do so much stuff. I waste a lot of time reading tutorials on blogs to learn how to do things like make aprons, twirly skirts, headbands, photo editing, blog design, baking, blah, blah, blah. In the end, I just end up dabbling in each category, pretending that someday I will actually be able to devote the time to really be good at it. Right. So I just settle for mediocrity in everything.
{But I'm still really loving this apron I made, even if it was a BIG waste of time}
So, although it has been a real bummer having to go through insurance and all that to get my car fixed, it did give me a much needed wake up call. What if I had just blanked out while on the freeway? What should I REALLY be focusing on? In a few short years, things WILL get easier and I will be able to spend more time on ME and my hobbies. But I am sure that I will regret the time wasted on frivolous things rather than spent enjoying my kids. I know that they will never remember if our house was perfectly clean or if I was totally awesome at making stuff. They will only remember the small moments where I paid attention to their worries and cares. I'm going to be better, more focused on what is really important. Because the alternative is getting medicated and/or abusing more light poles and car bumpers.
7 comments:
I remember one day a looong time ago, when the boys were young. You told me you took the kids to the children's museum once a month and the library once a week....I am still striving to be like you and accomplish at least those 2 things.
You do a great job. Keep your chin up (it's harder to see the mess if your looking up!)
I am with amy16. I read your blog and how you laugh at yourself and the craziness of your life and I love it and I can totally relate but I don't do half as much or have half as many kids as you do. You are amazing. I think that my secret to happiness is to have low expectations (for myself and for others) and I am pretty sure it isn't healthy but it is working for now. What I am saying is that I am always amazed by the amount of that you consistently do on a daily basis. You are an amazing person. Also, I can't believe you can clean your house in an hour. I couldn't even clean my house in an hour before I had kids. I am really slow and generally wonder from room to room totally overwhelmed and then end up getting a couple of laundry baskets, filling them with all the junk laying around our house, and then shove them in some closet. Luckily, I have a husband who is a way bigger slob than I could ever be so this type of cleaning style is right up his ally.
Oh my word, you hit a pole?! I'm glad that you were alright and going only 5 mph. I'm with Amy and how great it is that you can laugh at yourself and your recent ADD but at the same time have a good reality check.
I've actually been thinking about you a lot lately after I read your post of your schedule one day. I remember reading how you did the dishes in the morning and other things that seemed like good solutions to keep my house clean and organized. I've attempted to imitate your schedule, but I've come to the conclusion that I don't have your superpowers. I'm always amazed at how much you can do. I have to admit, it was nice reading this post and your feelings. This is why I love blogging. It's nice to know we're all human.
ADD must work for you. Well disciplined kids, clean house, ADORABLE aprons, and still enough energy to clean my house and organize closets. Thanks again!
Thank you. Thank you. I am so lucky to have such great friends that read all my venting sessions. If you only could see what a mess I really am.
Amp; Amy-what are you doing blogging at a time like this? You are in Spain for heaven's sake!!! You should be out running with the bulls or enjoying a nice siesta or shopping for cute scarves.
All I know is that I"m digging that apron. And if it would make you feel better, I could walk around my house and snap a few pictures....lots of messes, unfinished projects and piles of laundry waiting to be folded (or worn!). I'm sure you're more on the ball than you think!
I think this I reminder I need as well. Thanks Sharese. By the way - that apron you made is adorable.
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