I am definitely guilty of thinking that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence as well. And that is usually the most discouraging thing to wonder what is wrong with ME that I can't make time to keep my house clean, my kids happy, and everything in working order the way everyone else does. I have been so blessed to have great friends that I can really talk to and not have to put a facade on with all the time. The best therapy for feeling overwhelmed with life is to call a good friend and listen to HER struggles or to drop in for a visit and see with my own eyes the crumbs on the floor or unfolded laundry piles. Little do my friends know that I am not disgusted with their mess, that I am actually celebrating on the inside that these things happen in their homes as well. I know that I am not a messy disorganized person so I shouldn't feel so self conscious when someone comes over and sees my kitchen in disarray, right? I want to be able to live in the moment and know that we all have messes and naughty kids sometimes and that is okay.
So the point of this post is that I am so grateful for good friends that I can lean on, complain to, and be inspired by when I don't have all the answers. It takes a lot of time to build up friendships that go beyond the superficial things and I have finally lived in one place long enough to have a good network behind me. So lets do each other a big favor and quit trying to be so perfect on the outside. As for me, I would just like to share a few photos from "Cyclone Sunday" at our house today as a service to those who only see our public personas with stylish clothing and matching hair ribbons.
Laundry, anyone?
I honestly think that my kids' bathroom counter consumes more toothpaste than their teeth.
I seriously just cleaned/organized this room top to bottom.
11 comments:
I love you! Thank you for sharing your thoughts and pics. I feel self-conscience many times because I know my house is in a constant state of CHAOS (can't have anyone over syndrome) and I don't make healthy dinners for my family nearly often enough. I love this post and am going to document the next couple of days (including what we eat which is a real embarrassment) and do a similar post. I think it will help me feel better. We are all guilty of thinking everyone is better or more together than we are...Maybe that is what is meant by "keeping up with the Joneses" I have never felt I like that statement applied to me because I don't care about or compare the material stuff but maybe immaterial appearances are just as much of a problem.
My little guy had a diaper leak yesterday that got onto his clothes, but I didn't have a warm outfit to change him into. I just told myself "It's not that bad". Even after re-packing the diaper bag and checking it again to make sure it has everything, and answering "yes" when I get asked if the diaper bag is ready...I STILL don't really have it together. Kids just have a way of humbling you like that, apparently. We just have to remember it. Great post!
Thanks for that! Sometimes it is nice to know that other people have crazy days too (as I yell at my kids for pulling my curtains down for the second time this morning). that my house isn't the only one that, even though I just cleaned it, is a disaster. I really look up to you, all the amazing things you do and what a great mother you are. It's nice to know that you have crazy, out of control days too. :)
I am so with you! When I see other kids acting up I think to myself, "oh, good, my kids aren't the only ones that act that way sometimes." It is hard to see others and not wonder how they do it, but we definately all have our strong points and weaknesses! THanks for the great post!
Sharese,
If it's possible, this post made me love you even more....I am a trainwreck.....and I don't even have a husband or kids. I mean a real TRAINWRECK. I am always in awe of you and all of my other women friends who just manage to get through the day! If I didn't work for Children's Services, my solution/advice would be to lock both the kids AND the husband in a closet with a loaf of bread and water! (AND OF COURSE, SOME AIR HOLES! TE HE) In all seriousness though, keep up the good work! You are a rock star!
XOXO,
Katy
PS- keep up the blogging in all of your spare time- I really enjoy getting your updates!
You know, it's interesting that you wrote this right now. Just yesterday in church, I sat in the back and looked around at everyone and thought to myself, "I don't belong." It was just one of those days where I felt so inadequate in all areas, and I looked around at all the perfect manicured women with their perfect accessories, cute smiles, and happy personalities. I thought to myself no matter how hard I try, I will never come close to being like these women. I suddenly felt like such a loser and outsider. I actually talked in detail about all of my frustrations to Jeff, and our discussion was similar to yours. I just need to chill out and realize I will never be exactly like the person next to me and it's OK. They have their own issuses and weaknesses. You're right that we're all a mess sometimes, and we just need to stop the madness with the perfect appearances and be more real. It would be so nice. Ugh, I'm sure I'm not making a bit of sense right now. I'm just glad you posted this.
Also, thank you for sharing your pictures, and THANK YOU for being so real. I wish I lived closer to you. When I read stuff like this, I really miss talking with you.
Hmmm....can't really relate. My kids NEVER leave crumbs, crayons, cars, and little bits of teeny pieces of cut up paper anywhere but in the appropriately designated spot. They always put dirty clothes in the hamper and neatly fold and tenderly tuck away the clean ones. It goes without saying they use just a pea sized amount of toothpaste before replacing the cap. My kids always graciously accept the outfit I have chosen for them, followed by a "Thank you, Mother". Slicing bananas for lunch does not induce mass conflict over who gets the mountain (the pointy ends). When cabinets and closet doors are opened nothing will fall on you. My motivation to exercise daily is not dampened by cold weather, early a.m. hours, or laziness. I make time for craftiness while the kids are holding hands singing and reading to each other. And maybe it's just good genes, but my hair always looks like I just stepped out of a salon. So, I wish I could help ya out here, but I just can't really relate. Good luck!
Thanks for the pick me up! Maybe I'll just go ahead and leave my laundry on the floor. And leave my bed unmade for day number four. :o)
Thanks for keeping it real Sharese! I keep reminding myself - as Zac pauses his streak of destruction for a moment to smile at me - that I will miss the chaos desperately when my kids are no longer around to cause it. They won't be around to smile at me or cover my cheek in slobber when they kiss me or tell me how much they love me. I try to savour these GPMs (Golden Parenting Moments) instead of focusing on the mess they created before the GPM - but sometimes it's a bit tricky!! Thanks for being the kind of friend who helps me want to savour the chaos.
Yes, thanks for this post! Keepin' it real! Making me want to take candid photos of my not so clean house to let my friends know (that THINK I keep a clean house) sometimes things aren't as they seem. I tend to look at others sometimes and think WOW they have it together! We all try but the most important thing to savor is this special time with our kids. They won't be kids forever and I don't want to regret not savoring the moments even when it is really hard to.
Thank you so much for this post. I was just talking to my friend about this very thing. I have been deeply depressed lately because I've been comparing myself. I mean, Yeah, ok. My house is pretty much always a mess. And I actually clean it up all nice and by the time hubby gets home, you can't even tell I've done anything (which hubby takes to mean that I didn't do anything...at all, lol). I often wish children were self-cleaning!
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